A year on
Well it's been 12 months since I started bleeding with the 1st mc.
We found that the mc's were probably a result of something the builders had used.
A year on...
Now we have new builders in fixing everything so life is moving forward. I woke up not feeling too bad today considering.
EXCEPT
Today a large crack was pointed out in the back of the toilet that was taken out & put aside to be re-used. The whole thing has to be replaced.
I lost it. In front of the builders. It's not even the toilet or the cost. It's the reminder of what those B'stards have put us through. Any other day would have made it a "sighing", "doesn't surprise me" matter. Today it's full blown tears, a feeling of not being able to cope and wanting to crawl under a rock & die. Well maybe not quite die because I have DD and a new baby growing inside me to think of.
but basically I feel like shite.
Doesn't help that I had to remind DH about the relevance of today & the next couple of days. Is it just a man thing? He did offer to come home, bless him, but with all this work on we probably can't afford it especially given the currrent economic climate.
My closest RL friend has started back at work today after ML so I don't even feel able to call her as she'll have more than enough on her plate. At least we'll be meeting up tomorrow so I can look forward to catching up with her news.
There's no real point to this, I just needed to vent and get it out of my system.
Thanks for being there & for reading if you got this far.
:bighug:
Just wanted to send you this and hope that your day improves xxxxx
*hugs* Mel.
I can only imagine how hard it is for you and yes, I think it is a man thing - they have their own weird ways of dealing with things.
Focus on the positive, you have a beautiful DD and another one on the way.
I hope you feel better soon.
Love Dee
xx
(((Mel))) It must be so tough and ten times harder because of this anniversary xx :(
Try to look to the future xx
((((( Mel )))))
Not sure what to say but wanted to give you a hug.
Elaine.
Huge hugs coming your way Mel, it has been a difficult year for you, but as you say, think to the future and the new life you have growing inside you.
I defintiely find when it comes to emotional things the differences between men and women really shows. My dh just doesn't open up and talk about anything and that can leave me feeling lonely and with so much in your head you need to vent somehow. That is why we love this forum so much as not only does it give us a place to open up and talk, often we are talking to like minded people who have had similar experiences.
So in answer to your question, yes it is a man thing, they just deal with things differently to women. So use us as much as you need, you have been a great support to me so i am more than happy to reciprocate.
Lots of hugs
Big :bighug: hun
Holly & Ethan
xx
Thanks ladies.
This is such a wonderful, warm, caring site. I don't know where I'd be without your support.
I'm feeling better today. Not so many builders in today and none that might point out extra defects to set me off again ;-). I felt so silly, builders must think I'm nuts bursting into tears over a crack in a toilet. Should get through it OK though.
Thanks again.
(((((((((MEL)))))))))))
You have had a crap year and no one is judging you for crying and losing it infront of the builders!!!
The question about DH and it being a man thing - yes it is!!! When we went for our appt on Wed Mark couldn't even remember how long ago it was since we m/c!! I think thats how they cope with it iykwim - just forget about it!!!
Anyway as you say things are moving forward you are going to have a fabby dabby bathroom :o) fitted by guys who know what they are doing xxxxx
:bighug:
It's horrid how these anniversaries just catch you isn't it, even though you have the new baby to think about. Huge hugs Mel. Hopefully seeing the old bathroom disappear will help put the bad memories to rest a little.
Men just dont react the same as us, my OH was gutted when I m/c the 1st time then with all that happend with my next baby then another m/c he took it out on the bottle rather than talk about it but never remembered things like when the babies were due It makes me mad cos I know his family think its 'all I have put him through' like it was my fault thats caused this, thats after months of telling me I was making his drinking up!
I just want to shout at him and remind him It's actually me who went through the worst not you!
Hugs -your not on your own
Stella