Childcare

Childcare
This morning, a big information pack arrived from our council about childcare. It's really good actually as they have listed all childminders, nurseries and creches associated with my postcode. Only problem is, I feel a huge sense of sadness about putting Jessica in any nursery or sending her to any childminder. I know it's early to be thinking about this but at my NCT class last week, all the mum's were saying how they were struggling to get places due to high demand so thought I better start looking into it seen as I'll be going back to work in May. I feel so sad about it all. How can I possibly let anyone else look after my little girl? DH keeps saying "we'll see how things are" at the end of the year but honestly, I cannot see any way of me not going back to work as we budgeted for my year off on mat leave so we could cope while I was off. Orrrrr, I feel quite upset. Maybe I should just get pregnant again!??!?!?!??!

it wont hurt to have her name down - IF you don't go back then someone else can have your place - you shouldn't feel bad. It's also natural to not want to leave her BUT you may feel differntly come may next year - by the time Emma was 8 months I was chomping at the bit for adult chat apart from about babies..... with Ryan i'm less hurried but mainly due to circumstances!

Thanks Lou, I hope you're right. At the moment, I cannot imagine leaving her with any kind of stranger. She is just too precious but as is everyone's baby. I'm hoping I will feel better about it later like you said but at the moment, I am just enjoying our time together and returning back to work is not high on my list of priorities.

give it time and see how you feel - you'll be amazed at what changes you go through in their first year :-)

Hi Elliebee There is a similar thread over on parents at the mo... I agree with Lou it is well worth going and having a look at the different options and getting Jessica signed up just in case. It may even be that by next may you might be ready to go back a couple of days a week rather than full time. It is difficult to leave your baby with strangers but it is also amazing how quickly those strangers become well known to you! Most of Adam's nursery workers are now really good friends that it will be sad when he leaves in a month. Sorry if I am imagining this next bit but... didn't you think about becoming a childmider yourself? Perhaps, if you really don't want to leave Jessica, you could look into that again so you would actually have an income when you need it. Going back to work and leaving your baby is hell but can be worth it too... Take care Alex

I feel exactly the same with Holly Elliebee. I booked her place at nursery last week because the places get full where I want her to go. I'm luckier in a way because she's going where Josh went so I already know the staff and know how happy Josh was. I wish I could be a sahm but finances just won't allow :-(. Even though I know the nursery is excellent it still makes me sad. I keep joking with my husband that we should try for a third as soon as I start back at work - he thinks i'm joking but there's a part of me that's serious!!!! Like I said on the other thread on the parents board I dreaded going back to work when Josh was a baby but once I was settled again I loved working part time and enjoyed being Sharon again not just Josh's Mummy. I felt human again and enjoyed my job. Josh enjoyed nursery soooo much and my days off with him I made sure we had quality time. I would definitely start looking round for childcare now and think about paying a deposit to secure a place if you do decide to go back. Have you gone off the idea of being a childminder yourself?? x

I completely sympathise Ellie, I'm back to work on Monday and although Alex will be with her grandmas both for 2 days a week, still makes me really sad that this time is over. As others have said, things do and will change over this first year and you may feel differently when the time comes so if nursery/childminder is what you'll need, it's worth geting her name down. Out of interest, what happened to your idea of becoming a childminder yourself? x

The idea of becoming a childminder myself is still there, it's just time wont allow it at the moment. I'd have to start looking into it again when Jessica is older but then I feel like time would be running out as I'd have to return back to work anyway. I don't know how long it takes to become registered?? Just had an interesting conversation at work though as I called in to meet another Mum and her new baby. I bumped into the head of HR and she joked we should open a creche. Me and my friend told her they should as they'd probably get a lot of interest from members of staff so she walked off and said she'd look into it. I'd feel much happier if work could do something because I do love my job, it's just I love my little girl so much more!! x

I haven't met any mum who doesn't feel like you do - i felt exactly the same. Going back to work is the hardest thing ever. I had the year off then went back to work full-time. Talk about coming down to earth with a bump. It took 6 months to get back into the swing of things as a year off is a long time out. But slowly and surely you do. And as much as i missed being with my little girl, if you make sure you are completely happy with your childcare provider then you can cope with leaving them. Now, nearly 2 years later, Elizabeth is a bright little girl who loves her nursery and all her friends and carers there. I still would love to be at home with her but i don't regret her going to nursery cause the benefits and happiness that she feels from going there far out-weigh those little heart-breaking moments that i feel.......

If work could do something Ellie that would be fab - the nursery that Adam goes to is our work one and it is fab. It is literally just at the end of the buidling so easy to go and pop in at lunch time if I want to. Plus they do parent play sessions where you get to finish work a bit early and go and do messy play with your kiddy. Fingers crossed that it all works out OK for you!!

Dont have any comment as we're gonna have to put J in nursery for at least 2 days a week as i have no option but to go back to work - but Ant works shifts so he'll be able to look after him on certian days. I dont know how i'll feel about someone else looking after him - he hasn't even been left with anyone else over night yet and i cant see me doing that for a while either!! But i think as they get older you'll feel differently - also it'll be good for you to get some time to yourself and feel like "you" again and also for Jessica to interact with other kids and get some independance by being away from you. It's hard to even imagaine it now but i'm sure as they get older it'll be less scary!! I know you weer joking about the pregnant bit... but im so broody for another!!! Although at 5am this morning when J wouldn't go back to sleep.... i wasn't feeling it anymore!!! lol. xx

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